Here’s what I know…
You cannot expect people to do what you want them to do,
unless you pay them.
You cannot stop telemarketers from calling,
unless you don’t have a phone.
You cannot expect people to tell the truth,
unless they are drunk.
You cannot expect people to listen to you,
unless you are talking about them.
You cannot stop religious people from knocking on your door,
unless you paint an upside down cross on your door in chicken blood.
You cannot expect people to send you a birthday card,
unless you remind them it’s your birthday.
You cannot stop politicians from lying,
unless they are dead.
Any Question?
—————————————————————————————by SG 2011
It’s all true.
Those are great Steve. Thanks for posting them. Also,
“You can not expect to lose weight if you are a tester for Ben & Jerry’s ice cream”
Thanks for stopping by, Janet. I wouldn’t mind being a tester for Ben & Jerry. That is seriously good ice cream. Now you have made me want it. . .dammit!
all these r very true! and damn it, janet now I want ice cream too!! btw if y tell the jehova witness people that u r buddist they leave very quick -not sure why but it works! off to get ice cream! ta ta
Well and even when you’re talking about them, if you really want people to listen, they will attend better if you are saying nice things. Thanks for the tip about the chicken blood; I’ll give that a try.
Yea, the chicken blood works wonders. Answering the door naked works too, but at my age, I don’t necessarily want to scare them away either. haha